That Far
The little jingle
Triggers immediate reaction
I feel vandalized;
I feel perpetual.
I hope that I’d stop my foolish antics. But damn me, because it isn’t all that foolish.
The thought of it being mutual; being okay; being valid…it seems so unreal.
It seems so out of reach.
Being serious is seriously starting to dawn on me.
“Your mom.”
Tell me what it is that you thought.
Because I think I’m reading more into this.
And I’m not serious.
But maybe, I’m more than you thought.
You’re the one who admitted to the façade.
Your façade.
Would you find it in your heart, anywhere, for someone?
Do I have to give that someone a name?
Do I have to humiliate myself like that?
I’m in your reach
And scoffed at; looked over; put on hold.
(Ceramic braces and a new tan wouldn’t jump at you)
You told me to promise to see you.
“…promise?”
“Well, I am off Friday.”
The clock calls, says it’s too late, and I can’t sleep.
I’d tell you pretty little things if I were to see you…
What’s the last thing you think of before you go to sleep?
The fact that you’re sleeping alone?
Or do you think of me?
Triggers immediate reaction
I feel vandalized;
I feel perpetual.
I hope that I’d stop my foolish antics. But damn me, because it isn’t all that foolish.
The thought of it being mutual; being okay; being valid…it seems so unreal.
It seems so out of reach.
Being serious is seriously starting to dawn on me.
“Your mom.”
Tell me what it is that you thought.
Because I think I’m reading more into this.
And I’m not serious.
But maybe, I’m more than you thought.
You’re the one who admitted to the façade.
Your façade.
Would you find it in your heart, anywhere, for someone?
Do I have to give that someone a name?
Do I have to humiliate myself like that?
I’m in your reach
And scoffed at; looked over; put on hold.
(Ceramic braces and a new tan wouldn’t jump at you)
You told me to promise to see you.
“…promise?”
“Well, I am off Friday.”
The clock calls, says it’s too late, and I can’t sleep.
I’d tell you pretty little things if I were to see you…
What’s the last thing you think of before you go to sleep?
The fact that you’re sleeping alone?
Or do you think of me?
posted by Sarah at 12:46 AM
4 Comments:
It's funny that when I read your latest entry, I realized how similar men are to one another. It has to do with a book I just read called "Wild at Heart". It it is written by John Eldredge.
The things you are feeling are legit. You said he was talking about being fake or something like that. That is why he won't commit, he feels that he will be exposed as a phony. All men have felt this way, and not one is an exception.
The man always feels inadequite as to whether or not he can live up to what the woman of there dreams expects.( this causes frustration in him, and the wound causes him to wear a mask )
At the same time you will feel that you can't make him love you, that there is nothing you can do right to win his affection totally. ( this is what also causes you to pull away with your wound )
The truth is, we all have wounds. We can either let them go and give them to the lord for healing, or hold them and die a slow death.
Wounds drain us, but not the wound itself, but rather, the attempt to hide them. My wife may choose not to be with me, or she may stay. What I need to do right now is work on me with Jesus and change myself, so that if she returns, I will be a better person.
Hey there Sarah Green. It has definitely been a while, eh?
Hit me up whenever you get a chance.
300-2292
later, Matt.
yeah, sarah, now that you have problems with me not blogging and what not I decided I would. and yeah, i'm too dum-dum to read and even slightly understand what your posts are about. and that post about ryan and your dad...welcome to my life honey.
yeah, and i'm commenting again cuz you should go read the comments on my post "I Wish." I know it's kinda sad and I don't want you to read it to bring back memories and such, but because man, we are deep.
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