Sunday, June 17, 2007

You Don't Have To Call

I am done with this, or as done as I possibly can be. I'm living this day, and giving back what it has given to me. I'm not looking for a quick fix, and I know when I do finally move out that everything will not fall perfectly into place. I know this. I won't anticipate these things.
But the independence that would come from it will be a much healthier life style as far as my personal relationships and psychological well being is concerned, though that is sad and a little mechanical and technological to say.
Everywhere I go for the rest of my life, the ones that I care about, they probably won't hear about everything, but I will try to make sure they don't see it from me.
Because I know she won't be living with the consequence of what happens tonight. I'll be getting out of this place with fleeting time.
It's just isn't me to wear what I feel so freely about my sleeve. I know I will be getting lessons of tolerance and perhaps some negotiating skills out of this, but I won't be saying any 'thank you's' for it, as immature it may be of me.

And everything said, I want to love you until I am ninety. Of all the things I've believed in, I believe in you. I frighten myself with reality, because people change. I don't want to change and have to say good-bye because of it. This is it.
This is what I can't live without. This is what I can't see or think without. I suppose I could blame your bright blue eyes, or the freckles about you I've tried to grow familiar with.
Maybe it's that he doesn't know.
I want to simply have him falling with me. Perhaps I'm falling apart. I'm right here. If I opened my eyes now, you'd have to wipe them away.
This isn't how I planned it, but I knew I never really could.
But I never expected you.

"And all she keeps inside isn't on the label...can I be your friend? We'll forget the past...Here and now, will we ever be again? ...She says that love is for fools that fall behind. I'm somewhere between..."

1 Comments:

Blogger MB said...

and I quote.. "One of these days you'll have to explain this to me." ; ) .. or something to that matter.

9:49 PM  

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